Function over Form

How different exercise is for me now that I’m in my fifties! In earlier decades when I set goals to move a certain amount of weight or to run a particular distance, my main motivation was usually to change my appearance so that it aligned more closely with some ideal I’d absorbed in our culture. I wanted flat abs, toned arms, slender thighs, and shapely calves-- genetics be damned. Even at my most fit, I could always find some way in which my appearance fell short. Now I’m primarily concerned with what my body’s capability, with building strength and endurance, and that feels a whole lot healthier. Now exercise isn’t something I do to myself but for myself, which makes it more enjoyable even when it doesn’t feel pleasant.

A couple weeks ago I had my first riding lesson of the year. My skills were rusty and the ride left me very sore and walking stiffly in the following days. This got me feeling a little nervous about my trip to Mongolia at the end of the summer, when I’ll spend six hours a day in the saddle. I also knew I was simply not riding fit, and the best way to get riding fit is to ride regularly. A rider contorts her body and calls on her muscles to move in ways they just otherwise don’t. Where else but astride a horse does one sometimes need to press down and make a scooting motion with an individual butt cheek?

The aches and pains I felt after that first lesson made me reluctant to return the following week. The tendons on the outside of my lower legs were screaming, which set off alarm bells in my head. But I remembered the orthopedist telling me that I could choose to ride through the pain and although healing would be delayed, it wouldn’t cause any damage. Some online research yielded the suggestion from a riders’ forum to fasten a wedge to the bottom of the stirrup to relieve the strain caused by placing weight on the outside of the foot as we wrap our legs around the horse. So, the next week I secured a small rubber doorstop to each iron with vet tape, and this made a huge difference!

With only 16 weeks until my departure date I need to not only achieve a higher level of fitness, but to get better at managing my mental state under physical discomfort. Like learning to persist through the first ten minutes of a jog, knowing it gets easier after that. Right now my mind wails “STOP or we’ll die!” the moment I start to get winded, and listening to that delicate panicky voice is not going to be helpful during a week of long rides and sleeping on the ground in Mongolia.

So into my exercise routine of walks wearing a weighted vest, workouts for riders (core strengthening moves and endless squats), and moving weights goes some jogs and high intensity interval training (HIIT). These aren’t my favorite activities, so mindset here is key. Such challenges aren’t punishment for slacking off over the winter and getting out of shape, but are measured doses of distress designed to increase both my physical and mental capacities. It’s the fitness version of eating my vegetables, and I’m betting that my four-months-from-now self will be grateful.

What do you find yourself approaching differently now than when you were younger, and how does that feel?